...the point is...[pt 2]

...The point is what it's always been.

I made a decision to stay here in Chicago for the summer, and whether I like it or not I have to live by that choice for the rest of the summer break. Whether it was the best decision or not is irrelevant. I can't worry about that now. I wanted to get a taste of what it's like being on my own-and that's what I got. I wasn't really ready for it, I think. I wasn't ready to fully feel it. To feel what I knew I was going to feel.

For some reason I thought the summer was going to feel different than it does now. I pictured it differently. I saw myself having lots of fun, hanging out with people that I know, being relaxed, etc. And it's not that I'm going to complain about my situation, but it's just a lot different than what I had imagined. All of my friends are gone away for summer break, I've got some great friends out in the suburbs. But I can go out there maybe twice in a month, (if even that anymore...)? It's just not the same... I'm glad to have a roof over my head too. I didn't know about that for a while, but all of my stuff is still packed in boxes, I'm sleeping on the floor, and I get the feeling that I'm not all that well liked by my roommates. I feel like an outsider... which sucks more because I barely have friends in this city anyways---done complaining, moving on...

I had been questioning the purpose to this all- my summer that is. And the purpose, my purpose hasn't changed. In fact it's been staring me right in the face the whole time. My purpose is and has always been to seek after God. I even mentioned that before as a random side thought alongside all my doubts and complaints, but therein lay the answer. I have been constantly encouraged to seek after God today-right now. And somehow I lost sight of that amid all of the other things that SEEM so important.

...and so in response to my earlier post, the point is- to seek God above everything else.

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"I wasn't happy. I wasn't happy where I was."
Oh, What is life without a purpose? What is purpose without LOVE?.....

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD:

And thou shalt LOVE the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart...